Mimpi Indah - Sweet Dreamzzz

Sebenarnya dah 2 minggu aku sibuk kat fakulti sebab tolong pensyarah nak propose program baru. Serius, memang banyak giler keja. Hari2 keja dari pagi sampai petang. Semalam lagi penat sebab aku pi awal.

Balik umah, tunggu Maghrib. Pastu terus pengsan hehehe.

Pastu aku pun mimpi. Kalau aku tido, memang selalu mimpi. Tak sah kalau tak mimpi. Tidur dalam bas ke, dalam kelas ke, sumer mimpi hahaha.

Tadi, mimpi aku ada banyak episod. Mimpi punya mimpi (yang aku tak ingat dah apa dia), tiba-tiba sampai satu episod aku ngah melambai kat sorang lelaki (kononnya boyfriend akula dalam mimpi tu).

Masa tu lebih kurang aku kat jeti. Dia baru naik bot nak pegi mana entah. Kiranya aku say goodbye lah.

Pastu, aku nak baliklah. Aku nak langkah dari jeti tu, aku berpaut pada seseorang (sebab tebing tu tinggi)...

jeng jeng jeng...

Aku tengok kaki dia. Aku tak tengok muka dulu. Yang aku ingat, dia pakai seluar putih, baju putih. Then, aku angkat muka.

"Eh, N!"

Dia sambut tangan aku, tolong aku naik, dia senyum tengok aku.

Aku pun konfius. Tadi boyfriend aku baru pegi, tetiba aku dah jumpa dia pulak.

........

End of mimpi aku.

Hermn, aku tak tau kenapa tapi aku rasa macam mimpi tu satu petunjuk pulak kat ak. haha. Sebab sebelum tido, aku mmg tak teringat kat sesapa pun. Lagi2 bila aku sibuk lately macam ni.

Yang pasti, sedikit sebanyak aku rasa bahagia jumpa N dalam mimpi hahahaha...

it had been my dream...

Since I was a little girl, I had always dreamed of being a teacher.

Yep, my ambition since I was a little girl was to be a TEACHER.

After sitting for SPM, I started to apply for institutions that will let me to become a teacher.

BUT I was so unfortunate that I didn't get any reply from them...

Well, life must go on...

So, I decided to go for a matriculation college thinking that it was a platform for me to apply for a degree in education, later on.

Then again, after completing my pre-university, I continued with my plan...

That time, I was so confident that my dream will finally come true when I was called for a test before an interview....

BUT again, I was not called for any interview.

Then, I knew, I failed again....did I do bad in the test?

Well, I don't know...maybe yes, maybe not.

Then, I sadly moved on to a course in Linguistic (English) since I was interested to be an English teacher...

Being in this course, slowly my interest to be a teacher had decreased.

Suddenly I felt that this course was very good for me....

since suddenly my interest grew deeper into translation and editing.

One fine day, I applied for a young lecturer scheme by chance...

and I was called for an interview.

This was what I dreamed of! I told myself...

BUT it was weird because my heart was not excited at all.

I went to the interview half-heartedly, knowing that my interest had changed...

I didn't expect anything good from the interview because

I HATE INTERVIEWS!

But it didn't mean that I didn't want to know the result and

I just wanted to know if I did well even if I failed to get it....

well, this thing, not all people can understand how I felt....

and rumour has it that I failed, AGAIN...and that was not the thing that bothered me...

well, just as I said, not everyone could understand even if I explained...

after quite a long time, I could get over my depression state and I started to accept that TEACHING is not for me.

yep...one lecturer once said to me, straight into my face:

"Are you sure you want to be a lecturer? You don't have the criteria, you know..."

She asked me the same thing many times, over and over again, that one day I answered:

"Yes, I know..."

That kept her silent after that....

BUT I kept thinking of her words...she is right!

I'm an introvert person. I only love to write but I don't really like to speak...especially teach...hermn...

Now, I must thank her though I was hurt. Why? She was true after all.

Teaching is not for me, at least for now...