what kind of feeling is this?

i had been avoiding this for all my life

i was so afraid of this kind of feeling

i was so afraid if i would ever be hurt by it

but then, i fell for it...

i fell very deeply into it though it wasn't me who started first...or was it me?

never mind because i really fell into it

at first i was happy

every day i felt was brand new

but now, everything seemed fake

was I dreaming or was it real?

doesn't matter because now this feeling is torturing me

i don't know why

i don't know what's the problem

aaaaaahhhh...maybe because karma has come?

i did this before to others

maybe it's payback time to me?

aaaaahhh...i had been avoiding this feeling

because i didn't want to hurt anyone

but alas! now i'm hurt

it's torturing me...so painful!

ah god, please help me! i need your guidance my Lord...

huhuhu i really wanna cry right now, i'm so sad, disappointed

why? at least give me a reason!